Digging one out of the draft archives for your entertainment. I am busy busy so I have nothing new for you guys. So enjoy. The Moby DJ set was late last September. (OMG I was out of my head with the old songs too. Really some DJ’s can make you cry with their awesomeness.)
*************
Now, I know that most frugal types probably aren’t partying the night away at nightclubs much anymore. And I have definitely slowed down in the past 2 years. But when I go, I like to throw down. Since my last serious club experience was at Nation in DC, on one of its final nights, I hadn’t been to any of the new warehouse-sized clubs downtown, until Moby a few weeks ago. I have been avoiding them for a reason. I’m not a “see and be seen”-person. I like going to clubs for the music and to get groovy. While I care that I am stylishly dressed, I really don’t give a sh*t what other people think or if they are looking at me. A nightclub is the last place I want to meet someone while they are drunk or high or both.
The last few times I’ve gone out with friends, the company has been the draw more than anything. I’m used to warehouse clubs in shady parts of town with very rough interiors and cheap $7 covers. Ambiance is nice, but I can get that from a cool and foggy rooftop and stars with some grilled cheese action rather than a $100K light show for which I’ve just paid $20 bucks at the door.
So, on to my rant… (quite a prelude, eh?)
The last few times I’ve been out, it’s like I’m in freakin’ Korea. What the heck is going on with this RESERVED TABLE bull-hockey? It’s really bizarre. In the past year that Nation’s shut down, it’s like I’ve moved to Koreatown in LA and everything is about table service. I’m not cripple. I can get my own damned drink thanks. I do occasionally like to sit though, so why can’t I sit *over* *there*?
Let me explain the strange cultural phenomenon of the Korean nightclub. You get tables and they serve you anju (finger foods like nuts, pretzels, chicken wings, fish cake, potato dishes, etc. They do it up.) and bottles of liquor. This is not cheap liquor, but very nice stuff like cognac and Johnny Walker Blue. They bring you glasses, ice, mixers and charge you stupidly expensive prices for it. But at Korean nightclubs, they will also ‘book’ and ‘hunt’ for you. This stems from their Confucian society where children after the age of 7 are no longer allowed to sit in mixed gender groups. Boys on one side, girls on the other. This segregation of the sexes leads to stunted emotional growth where men have no clue how to talk to women, which then leads to the peculiar practice of “booking.” Booking is where a guy asks his waiter to help him find some company for the evening. This means the waiter will go and find girls to bring to the table for him to meet. The reverse of this is “hunting”, where women do the same to meet boys. It’s ridiculous, but mildly entertaining when you’re not involved, especially when a girl is unwilling to go to the table and the waiters have to tug her across the dance floor. Hilarity ensues.
I’ve only been an observer of this since I’ve only been to Korean clubs with family and/or my boyfriend, hence no hunting and no booking for me.
I mention all this because for $150 bottles of Remy Martin VSOP, at least you get the value-add of a dating service. I can assure you these places in DC don’t do that, else it’s likely to be an entree into prostitution with your server. Speculation on my part, but I would not be scandalized to find out it’s true.
So what the heck is with this trend for table service? Every time I’ve been someplace that has it, no one is using it. Especially not the candy raver/techno-libertarian types who dig Moby. When is FUR going to learn that their new Friday night clientele is dirt-poor and suck down Red Bulls and vodka *before* they hit the club because $11 is too much at the bar?
Wait a sec. Now I think I understand what HIM was complaining about when his friends went out a few months ago. Those were table service prices. Hm. I wonder if he was with folks at an Asian bar?
Why? Why has this horrible service invaded DC like the Plague? Just spin me some good tunes, add some good lights, a $10 cover and some early bird drink specials. Make the bathrooms have toilet paper and running water. I’ll deal with all the rest. I’ll deal with the E-tards, the Narcs, the annoyingly creepy men who stare. I’ll deal with the aggro drunk guy who needs to be thrown out, the drunk girls throwing up in the stalls, anything. Just ditch the table service fer Pete’s sake.
ps- Time for a really funny true story. A close friend is Korean-German. He goes to Korea and is out clubbing. In his adopted uptight Teutonic fashion, he decides that he cannot drink Remy Martin out of a regular glass. His cousin and host, explains to the waiter that his cousin is visiting from Germany and is very *European*. He needs to have an actual brandy snifter. This causes quite a stir because my friend can be a little b*tch in his fastidiousness. As he explained to me, there was no way he was going to drink a fine cognac in the wrong glass. LOL. I love him.
No related posts.
Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.
{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }
Clubs that successfully pull that off, of which there are very few, make more money than any of the other clubs. The rest try and emulate this trend that they see, not realizing that their clientele and/or the clientele they’re capable of attracting… don’t want this service, and they will most likely lose money in the long run by alienating the business they already have.
Everyone wants to be rich. Everyone wants the “most popular” club. It’s high school, except with millions of dollars.
Or, much like restaurants, the majority of clubs fail well before the owners decide to move on.