Ethical Decision Making in Personal Finance
I’m still holding onto my cut ponytail. I really don’t know what to do with it. Throwing it out seems like a waste since the hair is still pretty healthy. However, I have been really disturbed about the brouhaha over Locks of Love.
Honestly, I don’t really care if they don’t give the wigs to kids with cancer. The damned thing is out of my home. If they give it to kids with alopecia, that’s fine with me. Both kids need to buoy their self-esteem over hair loss. What disturbs me in the debate about Locks of Love is that the people against them appear to be making a value judgment saying that the kids with cancer are more deserving of wigs than those with alopecia. I’m going to argue that a child who suffers from hair loss should have a wig and it really doesn’t matter if it’s from cancer, alopecia, anorexia, or little green Martians living under their skin. It’s nuts the way people are talking. I find it really alarming. It’s a KID fer Pete’s sake. ANY CHILD WHO WANTS A WIG FOR HAIR LOSS SHOULD HAVE ONE. Not just the ones who have cancer.
I read the Locks of Love website and I knew that they gave wigs to kids with alopecia. It doesn’t bother me. As long as the hair is going *somewhere*, I don’t care really. If they want to sell it to meet their overhead cost, that’s fine. It’s not like I’m slipping in a twenty to help them defray the costs of their operations, which every charity must consider. I only resent them because the never acknowledged that I sent a donation of hair last year. I have no receipt with which to take a deduction. I have read the accusations that they only give wigs for permanent hair loss. That’s an operational decision on their part to focus on that. Ok. FINE. I can’t give college scholarships to every kid I know because I know too many, therefore I will give money only to my nephews until I start having kids of my own. Isn’t that a reasonable position to take?
Sure, it’s great that there are other organizations like Pantene and Wigs 4 Kids. Lovely. I’m glad they exist. What I don’t like is that they have extremely stringent requirements for their hair donations, which Locks of Love does not. If anything, Locks of Love is more democratic by accepting all donations of hair. They make donors, especially the children and *ME*, feel good by not rejecting their hair.
Ultimately, I think I’m going to give my hair to Locks of Love because of my prior relationship with their organization, but I have been really stewing about this for a while. I feel like I’ve been beaten up for being ignorant, when in actuality, it’s not ignorance but studied apathy. I simply didn’t care about this issue until someone made me stop and think that I might be wrong in some way by supporting this organization. But frankly, I don’t give a damn. Do readers want me to help another person or not? Because I’m ok with not. It’s what I was doing before when the hair was on my head. The hair, she is gone off of my head now and I still don’t have to help another person. But I choose to be a helpful person and so I will do as I please and the complainers will be ignored.
Blogging is not one way street. The point has been noted, taken under advisement and shelved.
What does this have do with frugality or finances? Everything. This was to be simply a charitable donation and a deductible item. But it’s come with all of these ethical considerations that were quite unexpected. Think carefully how you spend your money, even on the charitable things. It could blow up into bigger issues. That CFL lightbulb? Saves you money sure, but did you buy it because you are cheap or because you care about reducing greenhouse emissions? Even our mundane choices, while they may be things about which you don’t really give a damn, somehow in a small measure, matter. You can’t focus too much on the minutiae or micro-levels of everything, but a perspective on them every once in a while might make a difference in your actions. So stop and think for a moment about the impact on the rest of the world when you make your decisions.
Single Ma wrote:
“I only resent them because the never acknowledged that I sent a donation of hair last year. I have no receipt with which to take a deduction.”
Question(s): How do you place a value on your hair? If they acknowledged that you sent a donation of hair last year, what do you expect it to say other than they received it? Do you really think donating HAIR is a deductible expense?
I’m just curious. I’ve donated clothes, shoes, small appliances, an old car, etc. All of these items have value (albeit a depreciated value) because I purchased them at one time. However, I’m not sure if I understand hair.
Posted on 05-Oct-07 at 10:46 am | Permalink
Sistah Ant wrote:
Great, thoughtful post.
Posted on 05-Oct-07 at 11:23 am | Permalink
Anonyme wrote:
I guess people are upset b/c they feel they were misled. But if you’re aware of the ‘issues’, and still wish to support the charity, that’s fine. It’s all about making an informed decision.
Posted on 05-Oct-07 at 11:42 am | Permalink
English Major wrote:
I haven’t previously commented on this issue, and I also haven’t read previous comment threads. Obviously, it’s inappropriate for commenters to berate you about your presumed ignorance. But it’s also sort of odd to proclaim your “studied apathy” and advise thinking carefully about the impact of your actions in the same post. Clearly, donating your hair anywhere is better than chucking it, because selling it can make a charity money. And as clearly, where to donate it is exclusively your decision. But I do have to question the “this charity is better because it makes *ME* feel good” reasoning. When all things are equal, that’s a reason to tip one way or another, I think–but it’s not a good reason to pick a less efficient organization over a more efficient one.
If it were me, my decision-making process would go like this:
If my hair does not fit the “extremely stringent requirements” for being used in actual hairpieces, it will either be discarded or sold. That means that I’m effectively choosing which organization to donate money to. So, which is the better organization? Let’s consider adults and children equal, and all diseases that cause hair loss alike, too. That said, Pantene Beautiful Lengths has provided as many hairpieces in one year as Locks of Love has in ten. Therefore, if my intention were to support the provision of hairpieces to people with disease-related hair loss, my donation would go there.
Obviously, donating your hair anywhere is better than chucking it, because selling it can make a charity money. And as obviously, where to donate it is exclusively your decision. But I do have to question the “this charity is better because it makes *ME* feel good” reasoning. When all things are equal, that’s a reason to tip one way or another, I think–but it’s not a good reason to pick a less efficient organization over a more efficient one.
Regardless of what you choose, your desire to help others is worthy of praise.
Posted on 05-Oct-07 at 12:34 pm | Permalink
English Major wrote:
Whoops–sorry about the intra-comment redundancy! I reorganized but forgot to delete.
Posted on 05-Oct-07 at 12:35 pm | Permalink
Single Ma wrote:
Hmm…kinda odd. I posted a comment (rather it was a question) but it seems to be gone now. Oh well, I don’t feel like retying it. You donate to who you want. No one else should care what you do with your hair/money.
Posted on 05-Oct-07 at 3:07 pm | Permalink
jennifer wrote:
Hey Mapgirl, I was one of the ones who commented on your earlier post and suggested Pantene’s program because I had a good experience with them. I just want to clarify that I absolutely agree with you that ANY person who is suffering from hair loss, whatever the disease, whatever the age, whatever the time, is deserving of a wig if they choose… I know too well that anything that provides people with dignity and makes them more comfortable when they are sick is a very good thing. My problem with Locks for Love was not their mission statement, it was that by most accounts it seems they are much less effective at providing the service than other programs I researched - for me, it was a matter of practicality. Those reasons have already been discussed and are all over the internet, so I won’t go over them again, but I just wanted to let you know that I was not critical of you personally. Clearly your heart is in the right place, and we all can’t take the time to do crazy research everything we buy or donate or do with our money… lord knows I don’t, that’s why I read blogs like this! I just happened to have done a lot of research on the hair donation issue and wanted to share with you my findings and good experience with Pantene, since you’ve pointed out so many great things to me in the time I’ve been reading your blog. So I hope you didn’t take my comments the wrong way, and good luck with whatever you do with the hair… as you say, whatever you donate it to is better than throwing it out anyway!
Posted on 05-Oct-07 at 4:26 pm | Permalink
Mrs. Micah wrote:
I think it’s better to give it to LoL than nobody. I also think that if it goes to LoL, it’ll do good for someone. I say, go for it.
It’s sad that people are getting angry with you because they think you’re not making the _best possible_ decision. Sometimes making a good one is enough, especially with small things. It’s not like you’re sending them a million dollars…that would have to be thoroughly researched and such.
I think what you’re doing is good and I hope you can start feeling good about it.
Posted on 05-Oct-07 at 6:07 pm | Permalink
Marie wrote:
The first time I donated to Locks of Love I specifically had to request a thank you note for my hair. I donated in March of this year and they automatically sent me a thanks. It was also a lot classier than the first.
Posted on 05-Oct-07 at 10:29 pm | Permalink
Roundup for the Week Ending October 6 on Consumerism Commentary: A Personal Finance Blog wrote:
[…] Ethical Decision Making in Personal Finance. Mapgirl wants to make the best use of her cut ponytail. Locks of Love is drawing criticism for the organization’s choices in follicular generosity, but I agree with Mapgirl’s point of view. […]
Posted on 06-Oct-07 at 8:42 am | Permalink
ms. m&p wrote:
I’m chiming in late and there are a lot of issues here to respond to…but other commentors and you have covered them well so I’ll stay mum.
I did want to say that I appreciate that Locks of Love gives wigs to children with alopecia. Alopecia often makes hair loss permanent and the ridicule they endure at school is horibble. In my job, I’ve worked with some children with the disease. I’ve heard stories about schools not letting the kids wear hats or scarves due to dress codes so they have go bald all day unless they have a wig (strange logic, I know). There is little understanding of the disease so the kids may be treated oddly by their peers and teachers. With wigs, they can fit in much better and acclimate. You’re right–they are SO deserving–and again, this is a permanent condition for most of them.
Posted on 06-Oct-07 at 9:15 am | Permalink
Erin wrote:
I never knew there was controversy over Locks of Love. I sent off 11 inches of my hair to them last year. I had been growing it out for awhile just for them. I did get a certificate back from for the donation, but there was a place on the submission to check whether or not I wanted a certificate. I’m sorry you didn’t get any acknowledgement from them
Posted on 07-Oct-07 at 8:31 am | Permalink
mapgirlsfiscalchallenge wrote:
Single Ma - That comment got eaten b/c of spam filters. I passed it through though. Through one of the articles on Locks of Love, I found out they sell it for $4 a ponytail of hair. I’ll be asking them for a receipt for $4. But truthfully, I am pretty sure they could get more for it if I had cut more off.
English Major - I wrote ’studied apathy’ because I truly didn’t care. It was deliberate on my part not to research the organization like I usually would, hence the use of the past tense. It’s only now that I care about it since someone pointed it out. Otherwise, I would have gone on not caring about where the hair went at all. I never would have stopped to consider it because trash to me.
Posted on 07-Oct-07 at 10:39 pm | Permalink